


Beware of Chair

by killerweasel



Category: Good Omens (TV Series)
Genre: F/M, Ineffable Bureaucracy (Good Omens)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-17
Updated: 2020-03-17
Packaged: 2021-02-28 22:21:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 465
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23194651
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/killerweasel/pseuds/killerweasel
Summary: Inspired byJon Hamm vs a chairin 'Tag'.
Relationships: Beelzebub/Gabriel (Good Omens)
Comments: 5
Kudos: 29





	Beware of Chair

Title: Beware of Chair  
Fandom: Good Omens (TV Series)  
Characters: Beelzebub, Gabriel  
Pairings: Beelzebub/Gabriel  
Word Count: 430  
Rating: G  
A/N: After Episode 6.  
Summary: Inspired by [Jon Hamm vs a chair](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=royuCXeS8go) in 'Tag'.

"Did you think I wouldn't find out what you did, Gabriel?"

Gabriel looked up from the paperwork he was reading to find Beelzebub in his office. He glanced around, trying to figure out how she'd not only managed to get into Heaven, but kept her aura hidden from him. He set down the paper he was holding and loosened his tie. "Beelz. What are you doing here?"

"I know about your little 'vacation trip' to Atlantic City." Beelzebub snapped her fingers, sealing his office door shut. Another snap soundproofed the room. As she smiled at him, her teeth lengthened to fangs.

A tingle went down Gabriel's spine. A second tingle went straight to his groin and he glared at his pants for a moment before focusing on the angry demon in front of him. "In my defense, I didn't know it wasn't you until after I was tied down to the bed."

"Azzzomdeus has a completely different aura than I do!" She advanced on his desk, unholy energy flashing up and down her arms. "I don't zzzhare what's mine with other demonzzz, especially not with him!"

Keeping the desk between the two of them, Gabriel got up out of his chair. "I apologized! And we didn't do anything. He thought it was hysterical to leave me naked and handcuffed to the bed. Those were the ones I got you for Valentine's Day. Which is also why I thought he was you."

As soon as the words left his mouth, he realized he should have kept it shut. Beelzebub's wings manifested, spreading out behind her. Gabriel swallowed nervously. "You can't trap me in my own office."

"Can't I? I'm pretty sure I have."

He glanced behind him at the window overlooking Earth. Grabbing his chair, he threw it at the window as hard as he could, only to have it bounce off and slam into his head. Gabriel dropped to the ground like a sack of apples. "Oh, fuck me."

As he tried to figure out if he'd done any permanent damage to himself, he heard Beelzebub start to giggle. The giggles turned into full-blown laughter until the Prince of Hell was doubled over, trying to catch her breath. The room started spinning and Gabriel closed his eyes.

"You are zzzuch a moron." Beelzebub's fingers curled around his chin. "We made a bet. He didn't think you could figure it out until after the two of you were..." She snorted. "You've got quite the bump on your head. Would you like me to kiss it and make it better?"

"Yes, please."


End file.
